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Only occasionally will there be five Spice Girls at the table simultaneously. They couldn't get anyone to understand their English, and they couldn't find the toilet, and they were bursting. In their homeland, for instance, the Spice Girls are in the papers every single day. Weighty pieces analyzing the Spice Girls' significance, furthering an endless, Sisyphean national debate over whether they are A Good Thing or A Bad Thing. "I don't think anybody took any notice of it, did they? When she told them who she was, they didn't believe her anyway. Afterward, she will point at the computer monitors and ask, over and over, "I want an Internet. ") Geri answers a question about the media putting down the Spice Girls. A note swiftly appears on her computer from the AOL chat-room guide. Even that is a violation of our terms of service." "Oh, balls," Geri types to the world. "Only me and Emma are solid ones." "Niagara Falls, I am," says Victoria. Thirty seconds later, I have Bob Herbert on the phone. A British morning TV show, , got hold of the doodles the Spice Girls drew while answering the questions and had them analyzed. I thought, "That's not very nice." Then I thought, "Fuck it." VICTORIA: That I wear cheap makeup. And what upsets me is when things upset your family. The true nexus of Spice-hating is, naturally, on the Internet.

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Mel B wanders over to the potted plant in the corner and begins talking to it. Then she walks back and hands me a matted clump from the top of her head. "We might put a boogie under the table in someone's office." They laugh. My favorite recent story was when Geri got a false fingernail stuck in her ear on a video shoot. Someone asks Victoria when Spice Girls' second album will be released, and she shouts to Simon Fuller, their manager, to find out (early November). I got it when I first met them, at a photo session in London some months ago. "They're trying to make out that they are 'girl power' and made it all themselves," Herbert says. But to make the ingredients work, you have to get five spices together." Emma was recommended by a singing teacher, and Herbert doesn't believe that she and Victoria really knew each other. "She wrote something a little bit naughty," they explained. "The film is five days in the life of the Spice Girls," says Victoria. EMMA: The time I was on holiday in Barbados, and they got pictures of me and my bottom. "The rules are Spice Girl simple," the site explains.

"I want to give the young man a lock of my hair," she explains to the others. Not to be outdone, Victoria carefully extracts a single strand of her hair and hands it over. It made the front page of , Britain's best-selling tabloid, and on the inside was a competition to give away what the paper said was the actual recovered false fingernail. " When I mention that story today, Mel B says, "He got the shit beat out of him, so that's that. I think Madonna is so talented and so intelligent, but some people just think she's a talentless slag. MEL B: I'd probably laugh [] and think, "Oh, well, I don't blame you for thinking that." But maybe if they were abusive and started trying to shout at me, then I'd probably chin 'em. He insists that they were never told to dress the same: The whole point of the auditions had been to find five strikingly different girls. My mum, as well – me and my mum's bottoms on the front of the paper, saying, "Emma's 21, but she's got the bum of a 40-year-old." Don't laugh! "Every time you hear one of those awful voices and spot a spicy airhead popping up, give it a resounding virtual slap." They have heard about the Slap a Spice Girl game and claim not to mind. They have a big Pepsi sponsorship deal, and they have messed up before.

They have gathered in this private function room at the Four Seasons Hotel in New York so that I may discover a little more about them. 1, and the follow-up single, "Say You'll Be There," is heading in the same direction. Then she is told, and she gives her answer: "I love America Online. They spent the next year "writing, recording, dancing and eating toast" and eventually hooked up with a management company run by Annie Lennox's manager, Simon Fuller, in March 1995. For instance – though I'm not entirely sure why they would lie about this – they were actually brought together a year later than they claim: in March 1994. Some have suggested that the payoff they received swore them to silence. They have just been at the Cannes Film Festival to drum up interest in it. She thinks it might stem from when she visited the center of London as a little girl, and she saw a gigantic model of King Kong on the side of a building. She perks up: "That'd be a fucking good one, wouldn't it? " And it'd be great promotion for the second album. " He'd probably think I'm some kind of man-eater who can shag for 10 hours. I know who I am." MEL C: I think I've got off quite lightly. "I think there are people who hate us because I've got a smile on my face," says Emma.

You quickly learn that in the flesh, as on record and video, the most important value in Spiceland is not decorum. "President Clinton picks his nose." The Spice Girl is a restless creature. Nonetheless, it is perhaps hard for America to understand quite how famous Spice Girls have become in the rest of the world. (The tabloids' evergreen favorites are finding a new set of topless or nude photos of Geri – who did a little "glamour" modeling when she was younger – or a new set of Emma's childhood advertising photos, looking blond and smiley and product-friendly.) Trivia. (In December, Mel C was faced with the headline: SPICE GIRLS' COCAINE SHAME: ALL NIGHT BINGES SHOCK FOR YOUNG FANS, which claimed for her a past of various debaucheries. watch the Spice Girls host an America Online press conference, each in her own chat room. She tells me about going into a sex chat room once and playing along. It's a chance to speak to the world." (Mel B is clearly not an expert on these matters. When I point this out, they don't disagree; they just try to make a joke out of it. But when a friend of mine mentions that he has an old number for them, I decide to try my luck. Once you get over that bit, then you should enjoy sex because it's me, and I'm shit hot in bed. During a press conference there, they made the journalists do a Mexican wave. It's like us under a microscope and then through a telescope." There have been, I point out, far more terrible pop-star films than good ones. "Because," says Mel B, who has shoved a bread roll down the front of her shirt, "I've got a third tit." personal glimpse #3. Anyway, one thing she very much wants to do while in New York is avoid seeing the Statue of Liberty. Sometimes, for a second, something makes you go, "Oh." Ages ago, one of the first things in the paper about us, I was described as the plain one. "Everything can't always be nice and dandy," says Mel B. "People just hate you because you're blond," points out Mel B.

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